Be present

"Facing the emptiness inside you is simply the prelude to being filled with My Fullness"
Jesus Calling Dec 17

I was going to post that on my facebook status and then I thought - how will people receive that and how do I want to represent myself to the world (the world being my little world of people that call me their friend on FB which includes people I haven't talked to since High School and my very best friends and family). When I check FB, I sometimes read posts that make me cringe. It makes me feel unsettled inside to read negative posts about ex-spouses or even random strangers. I'm tempted to "hide" some of those people in my world. I'm not talking about you. If you are taking time to read this, you aren't the one posting that kinda stuff.

So instead of joining the world of thoughtful posts (I'd rather post about Casher's new comment that made me laugh) I decided to write a blog. I was inspired by my friend Susie Grade. She is eloquent, completely herself and introspective in her relationship with God and she shares that with others! I have been impacted by her posts. So, here goes.

Jesus Calling is my daily devotional that I have shared with many friends. I don't read it every day but I have read it on and off since I was pregnant with Casher. He's 3 1/2 now. I have about three things I think I really need to be doing right now instead of writing this including finishing a Christmas present and starting to think about waking Casher up to get him ready for preschool, and sending that email that I have been composing in my head. I feel so pulled in so many directions especially with Christmas next week.

When I read, "As you rest in my Presence, My Light within you grows brighter and brighter. Facing the emptiness inside you is simply the prelude to being filled with My Fullness" I was able to sigh a breath of relief! Jesus knows how I feel. He knows I feel empty in the wake of the Newtown, CT events. He knows I feel empty because I have been grouchy with my husband, the easiest person to let my true self pour out on. He knows I am "feeling sluggish and inadequate." And he invites me to step into his Light and into his presence. He knows His presence is Full and that is all I need today.

I filled in the spot "Blog Title" with "Present" because that's what I'm trying to do - be present. In this moment. With Casher and Mitch. On that phone call with that friend. In line at Starbucks. When I pray. When I wake up in the morning. Be present when I feel that emptiness inside me and know that I'm being filled up with his fullness.